


This Is How You Remind Me Of What I Really Am

by noladyme



Series: Skip To My Lou, My Darling [7]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-09 20:08:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27562051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noladyme/pseuds/noladyme
Summary: The road so far...Lulu has somewhat settled in to the bunker with the Winchesters - the ever affectionate Dean, and his sick brother, Sam - after facing both vampires, demons and a frozen ghost.Frustrated from all training and no actual hunting, she seeks out something for herself. But when she meets the scribe of God, her world - once again - is turned upside down.Our story continues in season 9.
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Original Female Character(s), Dean Winchester/Other(s), Sam Winchester/Original Female Character (Platonic)
Series: Skip To My Lou, My Darling [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2007559
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

“… with the fall a witness/keeper (translation unclear) will be chosen; and she will come to know them all by their grace…”  
\- Kevin Tran’s translation from old Enochian, from the angel tablet; handwritten by God’s scribe.  
\---

“No”.  
“Yes!”.  
“It’s not happening”.  
“Dean, come on…!”.

A month after our incident in Sioux Falls, Dean was still sore about me driving his car without his say so. It had been 15 of the most thrilling minutes of my life, before he’d literally threatened to set fire to Sam’s computer – and I’d relented; pulling over to let him drive his baby himself.  
I’d spent days after our return to the bunker making amends in every way possible; but even pie and sex – and pie during sex – had still not earned me back my front seat privileges.

“Sam’s not even going out with us – and you won’t let Kevin leave the bunker. I’m not sitting in the back seat, when it’s just the two of us in the car”, I complained.  
“Then you’re not going”, Dean declared.  
“Fine. You go grocery shopping alone”, I smirked. “I’m late, anyways. Remember my shade?”.  
Dean frowned.  
“I’m not buying you lipstick alone!”.  
I crossed my arms.  
“You absolutely are. I need it”, I said.  
“For what?”, Dean whined.  
“For my job…”, I said.

I’d taken a job as a bartender in a small music venue in Kansas City, just across the state line to Missouri. I didn’t actually have any bills to pay, but I hated living of Dean and Sam; and wanted my own earnings.

“You don’t need to work. I can have Charlie set you up with a card”, Dean muttered.  
“Ugh, this again”, I groaned. “You’ve had me on lockdown for weeks! I need to go out… Further away than the local Wendy’s”.  
“So, now you’re complaining about my choice of date-destinations?”, Dean grunted.  
I rolled my eyes.  
“Yeah… date”, I grumbled.  
“I paid!”, Dean “Even got you flowers…”.  
“That you stole from a Gas-n-Go!”, I frowned. “You even made me distract the cashier while you did it”.  
“What about the candlelit dinner?”, he asked.  
“We went through the drive-thru; and you put a birthday candle in my burger!”, I yelled. “And – oh yeah – Sam was there”.  
“It was a job!”, Dean shrugged. “Not my fault the joint was haunted”.

I threw my hands up in frustration, and stomped out of Deans room, to go find my stuff in room 13.  
He followed me down the hall.  
“And when are you gonna move in properly?”, he grunted. “You sleep in my room every night. No reason to waste electricity on another room”.  
“You have an unlimited supply of resources in this place”, I muttered, and stepped into the room; searching my bag for the dress demon-Tamara had given me. It would be fine for my first shift at the bar; as long as I wore jeans underneath it.

“It’s like you don’t want to be here… around me”, Dean said.  
I turned to face him.  
“This has nothing to do with you, Dean”, I smiled. “I need this for myself. I can’t be your in house sex-bunny for the rest of my life!”.  
Dean smirked and stepped up to me – twirling a lock of my hair around his fingers.  
“You didn’t mind last night…”, he teased.

He slid his hand around my waist, and pulled me flush against him. I swallowed hard, as his scent hit my nose, and warmth began merging from my core.  
“Dean…”, I croaked; as he leant in, and brushed his lips against my neck.  
“Lou…”, he breathed. His other hand travelled down to my bottom.  
“I need…”, I rasped.  
“Me too…”, Dean smiled; and moved his mouth to nibble at my lobe.  
“No… Oh, that feels… No!”. I pushed him away. “I have to get ready…”.  
“For grocery shopping?”, Dean grunted.  
“For work!”, I sighed. “You’re shopping alone, remember?”.

Dean went to lean against the wall.  
“I’d honestly rather have you hunting…”, he muttered.  
I smiled over my shoulder at him, and got out my makeup purse.  
“The last time we went on a hunt together – not counting the Wendy’s poltergeist – I got a ghost STD”, I chuckled.  
“So you’re done hunting?”, Dean asked; a slight hopeful tone to his voice.  
“Nope”, I said; and began taking off my t-shirt. “You just gonna look at me, while I change?”.  
“Absolutely!”, Dean smirked.  
I pulled off my top completely; walked over to him; and placed his hands on my bra-covered breasts.  
“Boobs. You happy now?”, I sighed. Dean looked like a kid in a candy store, and he smiled at my mounds. “Now, will you let me get ready?”.

I backed away from my main squeeze; leaving him to squeeze the air.  
“Oh, come on!”, he whined. “You can’t do that, and then just…”.  
“I absolutely can”, I smiled. “Oh, and until you let me ride shotgun again, that’s the last time you’ll get near these puppies”.  
“Fine!”, Dean growled. “But no driving!”.

I pulled the dress over my head, and pulled it down over my bottom.  
“You gonna wear pants with that?”, he muttered.  
“I hadn’t planned on it”, I lied; and instantly decided not to. “Do you have a problem with how I look?”, I challenged; turning around to face him again – sending him a sly grin.  
“Not at all… if you were a strip…”. He paused when he saw my expression. “Strip… mall… employee… Please don’t kill me”. He tried for an innocent smile.  
I sighed.  
“I like this dress. I like how I look in it”, I said.  
“So do I”, Dean retorted. “And so will every other male in a fifty mile radius, with a pulse… Maybe even some women”.  
“And that’s a problem?”, I asked.

Dean sat down on the bed, and threw his hands up in surrender.  
“What do you want me to say?”, he asked. “Go serve beers to strangers, looking like a dancer from an AC/DC video; and leave me here with my sick brother, to figure out how to close the gates of Hell?”.  
I blushed.  
“You think I look that good?”, I smiled. Dean grunted nonsensically.

I walked over to him, and straddled his lap; running my fingers through his short hair.  
“You wanted me to stay out of these trials; and I am”, I said. “I’m not even complaining that you’re keeping the king of Hell in the dungeon, we were supposed to make into a playroom”. I was still unhappy that I’d been cheated out of having a place to set up a gaming-room to hang out with Charlie in when she visited – I’d fallen in complete platonic love with the sweet nerd, after we’d been introduced a few weeks before.

Dean put his arms around my waist, and held me close.  
“There’s too much going on right now… You, out there – alone… I don’t like it”. His expression was serious.  
“I have my tattoo…”. I kissed his forehead. “… hex bags…”. His left cheek. “… my blade…”. Right cheek.  
Dean raised a brow at me.  
“Which you’ll hide where?”, he grunted. “That dress is… Crap, you really look hot!”.  
I chuckled, and pressed my lips to his. Dean held me tighter – making our kiss linger – and very distracting thoughts develop in my brain.

I groaned in frustration as he leant backwards, pulling me with him.  
“Stay…”, he breathed against my lips; and pushed me to lay on my back – leaning over me. His hand wandered up my thigh, and slid under the dress; tugging at my panties at my hip.  
“Dean…”, I sighed.  
“You want me to stop?”, he smirked, and moved his lips to kiss my neck; while putting his leg over me – his knee between my legs.  
“No… But I have to go”.  
“You really don’t…”, he whispered, and stroked his index finger inside my underwear; making me gasp when it found my folds.  
“It’s gonna take me forever to get to KC, without a ride. I need to catch a bu… oh my god…”.  
Deans finger entered me, and his thumb stroked my clit in that delicious way he’d found could make me soar.  
“I’ll give you a ride…”, he chuckled. “I’ll even drive you to work, afterwards”.  
“Please don’t make this harder than it already is…”, I moaned.  
“Right back at you, sweetheart”, Dean smirked.

As Dean kept pushing all the right buttons, I was soon quivering under his touch. He circled my nub, and stroked my walls in slow torturous movements, and with a desperate squeak, I came.  
“You don’t play fair”, I whimpered.  
“Playing fair doesn’t win the game. I taught you that during poker lessons”, he chuckled. He removed his finger from my insides, and slipped it into his mouth. “Now that that is settled, we can get back to that naked Karate Kid marathon”.

I got my panties back in place, and laughed softly.  
“I’m still going to work”, I smiled.  
“What?”, Dean grunted.  
“You thought you could convince me with a bit of playtime?”, I chuckled.  
I got up from the bed – trying desperately not to give away how much like jelly my legs felt – and pulled my dress back down. Dean grumbled, and got up as well.

I grabbed my leather jacket – slid my blade into the pocket I’d sown into that one as well – and put it and my ankle boots on.  
Dean followed me down the hallway – a sour expression on his face. We bumped in to Kevin, who instantly blushed at the sight of me.  
“You look nice, ma’am”, he said, not meeting my eyes; and scuttered off into his own room.  
“Thanks, Kevin!”, I smiled at him, as he closed the door behind him. “That kid is weird…”, I muttered.  
“He just doesn’t know how to talk to girls”, Dean said. “Especially ones in mini-dresses”.

Sam was seated in front of his computer in the library; looking sick as a dog.  
“How are you feeling?”, I said.  
Sam coughed, and ran a hand over his face.  
“I’ll be fine”, he said. Dean frowned. “I finished your ID. You sure about the name, though?”.  
“Yup”, I smiled. He handed me a driver’s license with my picture on it.  
“Well, here you go; Jordan Knight from Denver”, he said with a crooked smile.  
“Thank you”, I said.

I went to grab my purse.  
“Pop quiz!”, Dean called out.  
“I’ve got a bus to catch”, I groaned. Dean raised a brow at me. “Fine. Go”.  
“Werewolf”, Dean said.  
“Silver”, I sighed.  
“Ghoul?”, Sam challenged.  
“Decapitation”, I retorted.  
“We’re being too easy on you…”, Dean grunted. “Lamia”.  
“Season well with rosemary and salt; then cook over fire until dead”, I said, rolling my eyes. “Can I go now? I’ll be late”.  
“Smartass”, Dean muttered.

Sam stood up.  
“You got your hex bags? Holy water?”.  
I picked up my purse from the table.  
“Yes, dad”, I smiled. He chuckled weakly. “See you tomorrow”.  
Dean followed me to the stairs.  
“I put silver bullets in your .45. Carved devil’s traps into them”, he muttered.  
“Thanks, Daddy”, I smirked – making his lips twitch into a smile. I got on my toes, and kissed him gently. He squeezed my bottom.  
“I should take you…”, he said.  
I looked back at Sam, who’d gone back to his work.  
“You need to take care of your little brother”, I said. “Get groceries – and my lipstick. I’m almost out”.  
He grunted, and stole another kiss; before I walked up the stairs, and left the bunker.

\---

It being my first shift at the bar, I was happy it wasn’t too busy. A cover band played poor renditions of Queen; and the free drinks for employees came in handy – making it easier to deal with the guitarist’s butchering of the classics.  
Tips were good as well; probably due to my dress.

Taking a break around midnight, I checked my phone. I had one voicemail.  
“Lou. We had to go. Kevin figured out something… I don’t know when we’ll be back. I’m sorry… We brought the house guest with us, so you’ll have the place to yourselves… Please be careful. Don’t go out there alone. You know what I’m talking about… I love you”.  
Don’t go out there alone. Dean didn’t want me hunting; but he also didn’t tell me where he and Sam where going, or what they were doing.  
They’d taken Crowley. Whatever was happening, it was big – and I couldn’t help but feel a little frustrated to not have been included in the plans. Sam was sick, and Dean knew I would do anything for his brother – and for him.

I frowned my way through the rest of the shift; and hitched a ride with one of my new coworkers back to Lebanon. She was a cute as a button girl – just out of college – named Chloe.  
“It was a good first night for you Jordan! You should have seen me on my first shift”, she smiled, as I got out of the car by a building, I’d told her I lived in.  
“Yeah, I’ve worked in bars before”, I said.  
“I can tell. Well, good night!”.  
I waved her off, and waited until her Volvo was out of sight, before I took the 3-mile trek towards the bunker, on foot.

It felt strangely empty without the boys and Castiel there. Kevin’s face went white the minute I’d stepped into the library, and he practically ran to his room, to avoid conversation.  
Both the brother’s rooms showed evidence of them packing up in a hurry; Dean even having nabbed one of my own flannels – either by mistake, or because he liked how it’s snugness looked on him. Knowing him, it was probably the latter.

I texted him once I’d crawled under the sheets in his bed.  
\- You stole my shirt. Bring it back whole. And come back whole yourself. x  
I snuggled up to his pillow, which smelled like his shampoo, musk and gunpowder – reminding me to put my gun under my own pillow as I slept.

I had a restless sleep; and when I woke around noon, I still hadn’t heard back from Dean or Sam. I was getting worried, and considered calling up some of the emergency numbers I had in my phone; to see if any hunters had heard from any of them.  
I decided against it, knowing that the brothers would give me hell if I got anyone else involved in their plans. For all I knew, they were actually in the process of saving the world right then and there.

\---

My second night at the bar was busier than the night before. I was struggling with not knowing what was going on with Dean and Sam; and once again with the music. Bad renditions of Queen were now terrible ones of Zeppelin. Dean would have torn the place apart; or at the very least threatened the lead singer with a black eye, if he was there.

“Jordan! Table 4”, Chloe called out, and handed me a tray of drinks. I made my way through the crown, and smilingly served the patrons waiting.  
Once back at the bar, I checked my phone again. Nothing. I went into a storage room, and called up Kevin.  
“Hello…?”.  
“Kevin, it’s Lulu. Have you heard from the guys?”. There was no answer. “Kevin?”.  
“Sorry”, he squeaked. “You have my number?”.  
“Uh huh. And now you have mine”, I smiled.  
“Cool…”, the advanced placement student breathed.  
“Kevin? You heard from them”, I asked.  
“Uhm… no. Nothing. I can call you… if I do. Is it ok if I call you?”, he croaked.  
“Yes, Kevin. It’s ok if you call me”, I sighed.  
“Ok. Bye!”. He hung up.  
“Weird kid…”, I muttered.

I gave in, and dialed up Dean. Waiting to hear from him was tearing me apart.  
“This is Dean’s other, other, other cell. Two people have this number. If you’re not one of them, hang up. Sam; you know the deal. Find the nearest bar. Lou; yes… to whatever you’re about to say. Unless it’s driving privileges… beep”.  
I sighed.  
“Dean… What’s going on? Are you ok? I’m worried. Please call me… And I’m getting behind that wheel at some point. We both know it… I love you”.  
I hung up, and went back to work.  
I plastered on my fakest grin, and served beers for another hour, before, suddenly, someone called out for me. And not a person I’d hoped.  
“Lulu?”. I froze in place. “Lulu! It is you!”. Pete was standing right in front of me.  
“Hi… Pete”, I croaked. “What are you doing here? I thought you went back to Denver, when your old job went out of business”.  
Pete grinned at me.  
“Yeah, I did. I’m filling in as a singer for the next band”, he said. “Their lead has mono”.  
“Oh… ok”, I said.

He opened his arms for a hug, and I stepped into his arms; giving him a half-hearted embrace. A chill went through my body, reminding me of the intense cold I’d experienced while suffering from ghost possession a month before.  
“How are you?”, he asked. “Did Alaska not work out?”.  
“It was… too cold”, I said; and wiggled out of his hold.  
“You look good, honey”, he said.  
“Pete…”, I groaned.  
“Sorry, I know… It’s still hard not to think of you like that…”, Pete muttered. “I still think you and me…”.  
I shook my head.  
“No… Let’s not do that”, I said.  
“Is there someone else”.  
“Yes”, I replied.  
“And it’s serious?”, he croaked.  
“Very”, I nodded. “Look, my shift is almost over. I have to go”.

I went to pick up a tray from the bar, but Pete followed.  
“Lulu!”, he sighed, and grabbed my arm.  
“I have to go”, I said, and shrugged him off.  
“Who is he?”, Pete called after me. “How long? Was it while you and I were still…? Lulu, you owe me that much”.  
I sighed.  
“I’m sorry. I can’t talk about it”.  
“Why?”.  
I ran my hand through my hair, desperate to avoid the situation.  
“I’m in… witness protection”, I said quietly.  
Pete frowned.  
“After that thing at your hotel? With those fugitives?”.  
I nodded.  
“It’s complicated. But I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone you saw me here”.

“Jordan!”, Chloe called from behind the bar. “You gonna grab these drinks?”.  
I snatched up the tray.  
“Pete… Have a good show”, I muttered, and walked away; leaving him looking flabbergasted after me.

I knew what my encounter with Pete meant. I couldn’t keep working here. I should have stayed out of KC all together; but doing something for myself had made me happy.  
Nabbing up my tips, I discretely got my purse and my jacket, and slipped out the back of the bar, hurrying down the busy street, to catch a bus or a ride, or whatever I could, to get back to Lebanon.

The hair at the back of my neck were raising, and I felt shivers down my spine. Something was wrong. A part of my training with Sam and Dean the last month, had literally been hide and go seek; and I was at the point where I could feel it in my bones, when I was being tailed. Sliding my hand into my purse, I cocked the hammer on my gun, and went down an alley.  
I ducked behind a dumpster; and waited.

Pete came down the alley, clearly having followed me. I secured my gun, and stepped forward.  
“Pete, you should go. Please”, I said. Pete stepped over to me, and pulled me into his arms. He seemed stronger than he’d been when we were together, and it took everything in me to not let my hunter instinct take over, and go for my blade. “Let me go”, I muttered. “For both our sakes”.  
He pulled his head back, and looked at me with hard eyes.  
“Why? Because he’ll hurt you otherwise? Or me?”.  
I put my hands to his chest, and pushed hard.  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”, I sputtered. Pete narrowed his eyes at me, and ran his fingers down the still healing bruise on my neck, where the vampire Patrick had bitten me.  
“This… This is what he does to you. I can see in your eyes that you’re afraid!”.

Pete wasn’t wrong. I was afraid, but not of Dean. I was afraid for him, and for the rest of the world, with everything he and Sam were doing at the moment.  
Pete tilted his head, and stroked my cheek.  
“I lie awake… I drive myself crazy, thinking of you”, he sang softly.  
“Why are you singing that song?”, I croaked.  
“It’s your song… remember? You thought I wouldn’t remember, how you’d sing this to yourself, in the shower; while cleaning the bar after closing time… Even after sex. And then you’d close your eyes, and frown. That cute little frown”. He ran a finger across my forehead.  
“It’s not my song, Pete”. I knew I’d have to say something now, to finally get through to him. “It’s ours. His and mine. It was always him… I’m sorry”.

I shrugged Pete off, and began walking back towards the street, when suddenly he grabbed my arm, and put his hand on the back of my head, pressing his lips to mine. I desperately tried to push him off.  
“Stop!”, I cried out.  
Pete almost growled.  
“You know, you broke my heart!”, he said. “When you left me. You and me… we’re endgame. So you can call yourself Lulu or Jordan, or whatever… I’m still gonna…”. He pushed me backwards against a wall, and held me there. “Let me make you happy again”, he breathed, and attacked my lips. I tried raising my knee, but Pete pushed it down, and held himself flush against me – holding on hard to my arm, probably leaving bruises.

“Hey!”, someone called out. A middle-aged man had appeared in the alley. He put a hand on Pete’s arm, and pulled him off me. “I think you should leave the lady alone”.  
“Stay out of this, man!”, Pete snarled. “I’m her…”. He was distracted long enough for me to raise my fist, and punch him across the jaw, making him stumble backwards.  
“Leave, Pete!”, I growled. “Before something really bad happens”.

Pete stepped forwards, with an enraged expression painted on his face. The stranger stepped between us, and put a hand on his shoulder. Pete’s face immediately calmed, as he looked at the man.  
“Walk away, Pete. Now’s not the time”.  
“Now’s not the time”, Pete repeated; turned around, and walked out of the alley – leaving me with the stranger.

“Hello, Lulu”, the man smiled. I slipped my hand into my purse, and pulled out my gun.  
“Silver bullets, and devil’s traps carved into them”, I growled. “Who are you, and why are you here?”  
The man raised his hands into the air.  
“I’m not a demon!”, he called out. “And those bullets won’t hurt me… My name is Metatron”.  
I looked the man over. He was short; on the chubby side, and had unruly curly hair. He didn’t look that part of the scribe of God.  
“You?”, I grunted; slowly lowering my gun. “You’re Metatron?”.  
The little man smiled softly.  
“Yes, I am”, he said.

I took a step backwards, secured my gun, and put it back into my purse.  
“What do you want with me?”.  
He grinned.  
“Castiel speaks highly of you. Says you are a good friend, and that he enjoys spending time with you”, he responded. “I don’t have many friends here on earth, and in just a minute, something very big is going to happen. I’d like to share the moment with someone special. You will be the witness”.  
Metatron raised two fingers – walked towards me – and put them against my chest; right above my heart. A jolt went through me, like someone had put live electricity through my body.  
I cried out in pain.  
“What did you do to me? Where is Cass?”, I croaked. On shaky legs I tried to move away; but the angel grabbed my arm.  
“He’s… unavailable”, Metatron replied. “Now come here. Stand next to me”.  
I shook my head, and reached for my blade in my jacket.  
“No thank you. Stranger danger”, I gulped.  
The angel frowned.  
“That’s not very friendly. Especially after I saved you from Pete. Come here!”, he said; and yanked hard at my arm. “Look up!”.

I followed his line of sight into the sky; and my jaw dropped.  
“Can you see them?”, Metatron breathed.  
What looked like falling stars or comets where dropping from the sky, lighting up the alley, and the angel’s smiling face.  
“What are they?”, I croaked.  
“It’s the angels…”, he sighed. “They’re falling. Isn’t it beautiful?”.  
My breath hitched.  
“What did you do?”, I rasped.  
“What did we do? We changed the world!”, Metatron laughed. “I’m creating a new heaven”.

The angel grabbed my hand, and kissed my knuckles.  
“Thank you for sharing this moment with me!”, he smiled. “Castiel was right to choose you. You’re a good companion… I’ll remember that”.  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”, I whispered, and pulled my arm from his grasp.  
“It means, I’ll consider letting you live… if you make the right decisions when the time comes”. He winked at me. “Go home… wherever that is. We’ll meet again”.  
He was gone.

I tucked away my blade, and made my way back to the street on wobbly legs. People around me were looking at the sky. Once in a while I’d hear a random stranger mutter yes, and see them jolt slightly. It was as if an aura of light would come over them afterwards.

I dialed up Dean. After three rings, he finally picked up.  
“Lou”, he croaked.  
“Dean, what’s happening? The sky is on fire, and I was just… molested by both my ex and the scribe of God!”, I almost yelled. A homeless man passing me, gave me a strange look.  
“What did he do? Did he hurt you?”, Dean growled.  
“I don’t know…”, I admitted. “He touched me in that freaky angel way. Said he wanted me to witness”, I breathed.  
“What the hell…?”. I could hear that he was driving. “Baby, go home”.  
I continued walking down the sidewalk, once in a while getting a strange look from random strangers. They would nod at me, as if they knew me – their eyes alight with something I couldn’t define.  
“I can’t”, I whispered. “I think I have something stuck to my shoe”.  
“Dammit!”, Dean cried out, at my use of code. “Ok… Have you heard from Cass?”.  
“No, nothing”. I sighed. “Did you finish it?”.  
“No”, Dean said. “Yes… it’s complicated. Sam’s hurt. I have to find some help for him”.  
“Oh my god… What can I do?”.  
“Nothing… Lou, you need to disappear. Don’t let anyone find you. You know how to do that”.  
“Dean…”, I whimpered. “Please let me come to you. I need to help. I don’t even know who I’m hiding from”.  
“Help me by staying safe. Out of sight. Please do this for me, Lou… I can’t lose both of you”, Dean rasped. “I love you…”.  
“I love you, Dean”, I whispered.  
“I’ll find you when it’s over”. He hung up.

I was alone again. Kansas City wasn’t an option, I needed to get out of there as soon as possible. If I went to Lebanon – to the bunker – I’d draw whoever I was hiding from to it. I only had my most basic hunting tools, and no skills to fight anything more dangerous than a vampire or a very weak demon.  
The only thing I could do was – for once – to listen to Dean, and do as I was told. I needed to disappear.

\---

I hadn’t learnt to hotwire a car, and had no real cash to get me anywhere, so hitchhiking was my way forward. It took me 4 days to get to a small town in Michigan, named Hell.  
I was nothing if not aware of my situation. Last time I’d disappeared, I’d gone to Nowhere, because I didn’t want to be found by Dean, or by anyone else for that matter. This time, I’d literally gone to Hell, to avoid angels.

I was hungry and tired when I got out of a car full of rowdy frat boys, who wanted to party in the home of the Devil himself. I declined their offer of shacking up with them in their hotel, and instead searched out a cheap motel; which I knew I had no way to pay for. I’d have to think about that later.

Dean hadn’t called me, and I was unsure whether it would be safe to call him. I holed up in my room, snacked on cheap noodle cups, and kept my head down, when I once in a while was forced to leave the room by the maid – who would not take no for an answer, when I said I didn’t need my room cleaned up. I couldn’t be around her when she worked; her eyes were too intense, and she stared at me in a weird way.

After 3 more days of sheer panic; my phone finally rang, as I was lying in bed. I didn’t recognize the number, and my hands where shaking when I picked up.  
“Hello?”, I muttered.  
“Baby?”, Deans voice said.  
“What table?”, I croaked.  
“13. Always 13”, his warm voice said.  
“Dean… What’s going on? Can I come home?”, I whimpered.  
“Where are you?”, he asked.  
“Is it safe for you to know?”, I retorted.  
“Yeah…”.  
“In Hell”, I said.  
“What?”, he grunted.  
“Michigan. Hell. It’s a thing”, I sighed. “I wanna come back…”.  
Dean paused before answering.  
“That’s not a good idea right now, Lou”.  
“Oh…”, I croaked.  
“I’m sorry. Sam’s not… himself. It might not be safe. For either of you”.  
“I understand”, I lied.  
“You’re lying”, he grunted.  
“Yeah, I am. Why can’t you tell me what’s happening? When will this be over?”.  
He sighed, and I heard him moving from his room and down the hall – I recognized the echo.  
“Soon. I think. I need to keep Sam safe. And you”.  
“From what?”, I asked. “I don’t know who the bad guys are, and I don’t know how to protect myself from them… You know I hate to admit it, but I’m freaking out here!”.  
He must have stepped into the library, because the echo changed again.  
“I know… Look, I have to finish something up here, but after that I can come up to Michigan”, he said. “I wish… I wish it was different. Just please trust me”.  
I heard Sam step into the room.  
“Is that Lulu?”, he asked. “How’s her case going?”.  
“What is he talking about, Dean?”, I asked.  
“Yeah, it’s good. She’s good”, Dean said. “Look, sweetheart, I gotta go. Sam says hi. And uhm… iron, for witches. Ok?”.  
“Dean?”, I breathed.  
“Bye”. He hung up.

I dropped the phone on the bed, and curled up. Something was very wrong.

\---

I woke to a text from Kevin.  
Hi. This is Kevin Tran. Dean wants your address. So if you could text me back with that, that would be cool. xo K-Man.  
Five minutes later I got another text from the kid.  
Hi again. I didn’t mean to write xo. That was just a typo. Have a nice day. Kevin.  
I chuckled to myself, and texted him my info, sending him an xo in return. Because he deserved it.

In the afternoon I scraped up what little cash I had, and went to the front desk to pay for the week, but was informed that it had already been taken care of by a card registered to Gene Simmons. At least Dean had my back there.  
I was frustrated and angry. Dean was lying to Sam about where I was and what I was doing; and he apparently didn’t trust me enough to let me know what was going on either. At the same time, I missed him like crazy, and wanted nothing more than to be in his arms, and feel his warmth. In more ways than one, I was in Hell.

When the door knocked the morning after, I sprang out of bed, and quickly got dressed in jeans and my tank-top, to finally yell at the maid to go Heaven, because we were already in Hell; and I wanted her far, far away.  
I yanked open the door, and enraged look on my face; when I immediately let out a sigh of relief at the man in front of me.

Dean looked exhausted. He had dark circles around his eyes, and he was healing from some bruises to his jaw. I grabbed a hold of his jacket collar, and pulled him close – throwing my arms around his neck – and kissed him.  
“I drove all night”, he rasped. “I’m so sorry, Lou…”.  
“Shut up, and come in”, I said, and breathed in his scent; before pulling him inside.  
Dean looked around the room.  
“Wow… you really did go to Hell”, he grunted. “Does this place even take HBO?”.  
“The tv doesn’t work”, I muttered. “What happened? The truth, Dean. I can’t deal with lies right now”.

Dean scrunched up his brows.  
“I don’t know what to tell you… What happened with Metatron?”, he asked.  
I shrugged, still confused.  
“He was… weird”.  
“They tend to be”, Dean smirked.  
“Yeah but… The way he touched me… Then he wanted me to stand with him, and look at the angels falling. Witness, he said…”. Dean’s eyes fell to the ground.  
“He said that?”, he grunted. “Witness…”.  
“Yeah… Does that mean anything to you?”.  
Dean cleared his throat, and shook his head.  
“No. Nothing. Probably just weird angel talk… you know how they can be”.  
His expression was unreadable.

“Did they all fall? Where are they?”, I asked.  
“We think so… It seems Metatron tricked Cass into locking up Heaven…”, Dean muttered.  
“Holy crap…”, I gasped. “How is Sam?”, I muttered, walking over to make the bed – feeling strangely vulnerable.  
“We ended the trials… stopped before he could finish”, he said. “They were killing him…”.  
“Is he ok?”, I gulped. I couldn’t bear the thought of my friend hurt.  
“He’s getting there. I have someone working on it”.

I went to turn on the brewer for coffee. Dean knew my routine, and grabbed two mugs from the cabinet under the counter. I scratched my head.  
“I can’t stay here. I have none of my things with me. I can’t even hunt”.  
Dean narrowed his eyes.  
“Right…”, he said; before leaving the room for a moment – coming back with my backpack, and a duffle. “I brought some stuff”. He brought the bags over to the table, and set them down there.

“Looks like you’re kicking me out of the bat-cave permanently”, I grunted.  
“How can you think that?”, Dean exclaimed. “You know I want you with me… I practically begged you to move in to the bunker permanently, while you were doing everything to get away from it”.  
“I wasn’t”, I whispered; a tear escaping my eye. “I just needed to… do something for myself. Have something of my own, that I earned, and worked for”.

“That why you took that job?”, he asked. I nodded. “How did it go?”.  
“It didn’t…”, I said. “Pete turned up. I couldn’t stay there”.  
“Pete”, Dean sneered. “Don’t know which one of those dicks I hate more – him or Metatron”.  
“You don’t know Pete. He’s just a guy”.  
“He’s a douche…”, he grunted. “The man listens to Nickelback!”.  
I couldn’t help but chuckle, and wiped my eyes. Dean stroked my cheek.  
“Yeah… I don’t know what I was thinking”, I whispered.

Dean’s eyes travelled to my arm, which was still sporting faint bruises from my encounter with my ex. He lifted the arm gingerly, and ran his fingers over the now mostly purplish mark.  
“I’m gonna rip his lungs out!”, he growled.  
“Please, just leave it alone”, I croaked. “It’s over”.  
“He hurt you!”, Dean roared.  
“No more than I would have hurt him, if Metatron hadn’t stepped in”, I said.  
Dean raised a brow at me.  
“If I see him again, he’s dead”, he proclaimed. I tugged at his jacket, and pulled myself closer to him; feeling his tense body relax against me. He lowered his face to me, and kissed me gently; stroking my temple. “I’m sorry”.  
“Stop saying that, and show me what you brought”, I said.

Dean went back over to the table, and began pulling things of the bags.  
“Bobby’s… your journal”, he muttered. “Gooferdust – remember to use it whenever you check in somewhere new. Iron knife, silver knife… A jar of dead man’s blood, and some syringes…”.  
“Everything a working girl needs in her purse”, I jested. “And my clothes?”.  
“Kevin packed it up”, Dean said.  
“Huh… you let the teenage prophet go through my underwear?”, I smirked. Dean paused for a second.  
“I didn’t think that through”, he grunted. “Oh, and this…”. He handed me a small drugstore bag. I looked inside.  
“You got my shade!”, I smiled, and pulled out the lipstick. He chuckled.  
“Of course I did”.

I picked up a sawn-off shotgun.  
“So, you’re good with me hunting all of a sudden?”, I asked. He took the gun from my hands, and demonstrated the use. “Sam already showed me”, I smirked.  
“Of course he did…”, Dean grunted. “No, I’m not. But it’s your choice… And you’re… actually kind of ok at it”.  
I pouted playfully.  
“Aww… thanks”. I put down the shotgun. “Really…”.

We stood for a moment.  
“I hate this…”, Dean said.  
“What, awkward silence?”, I muttered.  
“No… leaving you out here alone”. He frowned deeply. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this. You were supposed to…”.  
“Bake you pies in my underwear, while you save the world?”, I smirked.  
Dean’s eyes glazed over for a moment, as he pictured the sight. He cleared his throat.  
“I mean, that would be fine by me”, he muttered. “But no. I wanted to train you. Make sure you were ready, before you finally realized you were crazy for staying with me, and ran off on bigger and better adventures”  
I smiled crookedly.  
“That was never gonna happen”, I said. “I’m not that smart”.

There was a knock at the door.  
“Housekeeping!”, a voice called out. I almost snarled.  
“What’s wrong?”, Dean asked.  
“Just the most dedicated maid I’ve ever met”, I sneered.  
I went to open the door, before the maid could let herself in. The woman’s eyes were as intense as always; if not more so. She attempted a smile, but it came out fake.

“It’s not a good time. I have company”, I said.  
“I’m just… making my rounds, miss”, the maid said. “I’d like to clean your room now, if you don’t mind”.  
Dean came up behind me.  
“She minds. It’s not a good time”.  
I saw a sheen of blue light in the maid’s eyes. It sent a jolt through me, and my heart skipped a beat.  
“You should go… now”, I croaked.  
“I’m afraid I can’t do that”, the maid said, her eyes locked sternly on Deans face. “I have to do my job. And he should not be here”.  
Dean pushed me behind him.  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”, he grunted.  
The maid moved her eyes to me. I felt a rush of blood to my head, as the light in her eyes intensified, and an aura of intense power pulsed from her. Suddenly, I recognized her – I’d never met her before – but I somehow knew, if not her, then at least what she was.  
“Angel…”, I rasped.

Dean grabbed his own angel blade from his inner pocket. He broadened his stance; shielding me.  
“Leave!”, he growled. Behind him, I went for my own blade, which I’d kept under my pillow. I quietly walked over the wall behind the door, and cut into my hand; letting it bleed.  
“You think I want to be here? This place… even the name of it is an offence to me”, the maid sneered. “But the witness must be protected. For now”.  
I began drawing with my blood on the wall.  
“She doesn’t need your protection”, Dean snarled.  
“You think you can protect her? From us?”, the maid smiled. “If we wanted her dead, she would be! Leave this place, Dean Winchester. Or I will not answer for the consequences”.

“Dean…”, I muttered. He looked back at me, and the sigil I’d drawn on the wall. He nodded, and I touched it with my bleeding hand. The angel-maid screamed out, and with a blaze of light, she disappeared.  
“Get your things!”, Dean growled. We scrambled to gather my bags; and I followed him out to the Impala, throwing my belongings in the back seat.

Dean jumped in behind the wheel, and I got in next to him.  
“How did you know?”, he snarled.  
“What?”, I asked.  
“How did you know she was an angel?”  
I shook my head, and held on to the dashboard as Dean swerved around a corner, and sped down the road.  
“I… just did. It was like I recognized her”.  
“You met her before?”, Dean snapped.  
He sped over a bump, making me jostle in my seat.  
“No, Dean. Could you please slow down? You’re scaring me!”.  
Dean clenched his jaw.  
“You recognized her? As an angel…”.  
“Yeah…”, I croaked; afraid to meet his eyes.  
Dean took a deep breath.  
“She used that word… witness. You… witnessed with Metatron. Right?”.  
“That’s what he said”, I muttered. “Why are you angry with me?”.  
“I’m not”, he sighed. He pulled out his phone and dialed up a number, putting it on speaker.

“Hello?”, Kevin’s voice answered.  
“Kevin!”, Dean growled. “what was that thing you read on the angel tablet a while back… about a witness”.  
“Hi Kevin”, I said, chiding Dean with my eyes for his poor social skills on the phone.  
“Hi… Lulu. Hey. I’m good. It’s cool”.  
“Kevin, stop flirting, and tell us!”, Dean snarled. I frowned at him.  
“Right. Yeah… it was something along the lines of ‘with the fall a witness will be chosen; and it will come to know them all by their grace’… I couldn’t figure out if it was witness or keeper”, Kevin said. Deans eyes widened.  
“Keeper of what?”, I asked.  
“I… don’t know. I was focused on other parts of the tablet at that point”.  
“Right. Thanks Kev’… and keep this between us”, Dean said, and hung up.

A thousand thoughts went through my head.  
“I’m a witness”, I said.  
“The witness. You can see angels, even as they hide in their vessels”, Dean grunted. “I was afraid of this, when you told me about what that winged bag of dicks did. I just wasn’t sure”.  
“Is that why I can’t come back?”, I asked quietly.  
Dean clenched his jaw.  
“I can’t have you around Sam… It’s not safe”.  
“For whom? Me or Sam?”, I grunted.  
“I’m not sure… I did what I had to”, Dean breathed. “He’s my brother”.  
“What did you do…?”, I said; my voice trembling and deep.  
“I… can’t tell you. Please just trust that it’s for the best if you stay away”.

I swallowed hard.  
“So what happens now? Are we… over?”.  
His eyes widened, and he grabbed my hand.  
“No! No, Lou… I just need… we need time for Sam to heal. Completely”, he said. Dean squeezed my hand tightly. “I swear I’ll tell you everything, when the time is right”, he declared. “I’m bringing you to a place I know. It’s a cabin. Warded”.  
“Ok…”, I croaked.  
He looked at me, trying for softness.  
“It’ll be ok”. He didn’t sound convinced; and his face was tense as he dialed another number on his phone. “Sam… Lulu’s in a bit deep here. I’m gonna need to stick around for another day or so… No, don’t worry, we’ll be fine… Yeah, ok. See you in Colorado”.  
I frowned at him again.  
“Why are you lying to your brother?”, I grunted.  
“He can’t see you right now. And you can’t see him. It’s how it has to be”.  
“He’s my friend”, I said bellow my breath.  
“Then you want him safe. Just go with me on this”, Dean demanded.

We drove for a good 4 hours, before I noticed Dean struggling. He was frowning and an angry pout formed on his lips.  
“You’re tired”, I said. “We should pull over”.  
“No”, he shook his head. “We need to get to Montana as soon as we can”. He sighed, and looked at me from the corner of his eyes. “Screw it. Can you drive for a while?”  
My jaw dropped.  
“I’m… yeah. Of course”.

Dean halted at the next gas-station we could find, and filled up the car. I got out of the car as he came back outside from the shop. He held up the keys with a worried expression.  
“She’s strong… but be gentle with her. Please?”.  
I smiled softly, and kissed his cheek.  
“I’ll treat her like my own”.  
“Yeah, I saw your Ford those years back. Pardon me for not taking that as a good omen”.  
He put the keys in my hand, and held them there.  
“Dean?”, I said.  
“Yeah?”, he muttered.  
“You’re gonna have to let go”, I smiled. He almost winced as his fingers left my hand.

I got behind the wheel, and Dean got in to sit next to me.  
“Don’t change my presets”, he grunted.  
“Go to sleep”, I said. “I got it”. I started up the Impala, and felt her purr under my touch. “Hi, baby. I’m back”, I smirked.  
Dean cursed under his breath.

\---

We took turns driving; pulling over a few times to gas up; and at least three times for Dean to yell at me for either driving too fast, or for passing other cars too closely. All three times ended with me threatening to hitchhike the rest of the way; and Dean apologizing by pressing his lips to mine.  
In the end we made it to a cabin in Whitefish, Montana, the day after.

“This is Rufus’ old cabin”, Dean said, as he carried my bags in for me. “You’ll be safe here. Use it as headquarters if you want. I need you to stay away from anything angelic or demonic from here on out… If you insist on hunting, stick with ghosts; easy ones…”. He sent me a look. “Please”.

He put his arms around me. He seemed weaker than usual; not just tired, but mentally drained.  
“What’s wrong?”, I whispered; leaning my head against his shoulder. “Talk to me”.  
Dean shook his head.  
“I can’t… I want to, believe me”.  
“You don’t trust me?”, I croaked.  
“With my life, and my car…”, he said poignantly; putting his hand on my cheek. I narrowed my eyes at him.  
“But…?”.  
“You can’t be around Sam right now. You just can’t. Not until I know for sure that it’s safe… Or Sam is ok again”.  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”, I grunted. “You’re not making sense. What happened with him back there?”.  
Dean ran his hand over his face.  
“I know it’s… confusing. But he’s in real danger”.  
I grabbed a hold of his jacket; clenching it in my fist.  
“How is this gonna work?”, I asked. “Are you going to run all over the country with your sick brother; and whenever you have a spare 24 hours, I can see you?”.  
He sighed.  
“I don’t have that much time… I have to get to Colorado”.

I sighed and put my hand behind his head, to avoid him pulling away: and kissed him deeply. I needed him as much as I knew he needed me.  
“Just stay a little while”, I breathed.

\---


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The road so far...
> 
> The day the angels fell from Heaven, Metatron made Lulu a witness. Now she can see angels, even as they hide within their vessels.  
> Holed up in Rufus' old cabin, Lulu is keeping out of sight, apparently to keep both herself and Sam safe - though Dean won't tell her why it's necessary.

Dean shrugged of his jacket and shirt – and with a hand on my hip, and the other on my bottom – he lifted me up to straddle him. Our lips were locked together – tongues exploring each other – as he carried me towards a door leading to a bedroom. He looked over the bed; apparently checking to see if it was clean enough. Satisfied that it was, he laid me down on it.  
He quickly removed his t-shirt, and smiled at me softly.  
“Come here”, I breathed, and reached for his hand. He crawled over me, and brushed his nose against mine; before kissing me again.

Our fingers intertwined, and the bruises on his knuckles made me sigh. I kissed his hand, while Dean looked on in wonder. Letting go of his hand, I ran my hands down Dean’s back; while he buried his face in the crook of my neck – leaving soft kisses on my skin there.  
“Sugar and spice; and gunpowder…”, he chuckled.  
“What?”, I laughed softly.  
“Your smell… It was always sugar and spice and everything nice… Now it’s gunpowder”.  
“I don’t smell nice anymore?”, I frowned.  
“You smell even better…”, he smirked. He pressed his lips to mine again, and pulled at my top. I sat up halfway, and let him take it off. It wasn’t long before his expert fingers had unhooked my bra, and he pulled it off me as well – kissing a trail from my collarbone, and down to my mounds; closing his lips around my left nipple, while his fingers stroked my right.

Deans green eyes met mine, as he gently sucked at my sensitive nub; and lifted his head slightly, letting it fall from his lips, and my breast bounce slightly. I chuckled, and pulled his face towards mine again.  
I spread my legs, and pulled myself backwards on the bed; inviting him to nestle between my thighs. Dean instantly accepted the offer, and pressed his jeans clad harness against my warmth.  
My breath hitched from the sensation, and my walls clenched slightly. He grinded against me, drawing soft moans from my mouth – and moved his hands to the button of my jeans, opening it and the zipper.

I took a deep breath, and laid on my back. Dean ran his fingers down my torso, between my breasts and down to my navel. His eyes traveled over my skin, as if he was trying to imprint my curves, freckles and dimples into his mind.  
With a long sigh, Dean sat up, and began pulling at my jeans and panties to get them off me. He kicked his own pants and boxers off, after having removed his boots; and then gestured for me to get on my belly.  
His fingertips slid down my back, from my shoulders, all the way to my butt; and between my cheeks. I felt him kiss his way down my spine, and back up again. I moved my hair out of the way to allow him access to the sweet spot bellow my ear; and smiled when the tip of his tongue stroked it, and his lips brushed my skin there.

Holding on to the pillow, I let out a gasp when Deans finders traveled down between my cheeks, searching for, and finding, my warmth. His thumb entered me, and his middle and ring finger played with my clit as he pushed my front wall from inside.  
I desperately wanted him inside me, and reached behind me to grasp his member; which was – to my satisfaction – responding to my touch, and hardening quickly.

As Deans thumb continued pushing and prodding, I felt a tingling from the bottom of my feet, and all the way up my legs – letting me know that my climax was already nearing. I turned my face into the pillow, letting our wanton moans.  
Dean must have been able to feel my end approaching, because his work in my vagina quickened, and he pressed harder at me. Suddenly, my walls clenched around his thumb, and I cried out into the pillow. Dean removed his thumb, and got on top of me; sliding into me from behind. His hand moved in front of me, and he continued his stroking of my bundle of nerves; trying to draw my orgasm out.

I couldn’t touch him as I lay there; I was completely at his mercy, as the weight of his body held me down, and he slowly – agonizingly slowly – thrusted into me, and rubbed at me. I delighted in the feeling of his chest against my back, holding me down; as he wielded his dominance over me in this manner – but his usual roughness when we would use this position wasn’t there. Once again, I climaxed; with Dean gasping against my neck from the sensation of my walls quivering around his hardness.  
As I came down, I turned my torso, so I could kiss Dean, and look into his soulful eyes. Dean smiled softly, and pulled out of me, so I could lay on my back instead, and he settled between my thighs, entering me again.

Chest to chest, our movements became like a slow dance; where I would meet his thrusts gently. He looked into my eyes, and parted his lips as if to say something, before he just shook his head, and kissed me.  
I put my arms around his back, under his arms, as he rested on his elbows on either side of my head, running his fingers through my hair, and stroking my cheek.  
Dean was tender in his movements, like he worried that he would hurt me. He gently stroked his hand down my arm, and grasped my hand; letting our finger intertwine.  
With my other arm, I held him closer, and closed my eyes in content pleasure. We couldn’t get any closer, but I wanted him as near and as deep as I could get him.

When I looked at him again, Dean was still staring at me.  
“What?”, I smiled.  
“I don’t want to forget how you look right now…”, he croaked.  
I furrowed my brow.  
“You’re saying that like you’re afraid I’ll disappear”, I said. “I’m right here…”.  
He sighed, and buried his face in the crook of my neck again. I stroked the back of his head, and kissed his temple.

Dean began thrusting deeper into me – still gently – and he let go of my hand, to put my leg around his hips.  
The closeness of his pubic bone to my bundle of nerves, began sending another rush of warmth through me, and I soon began moaning breathily. Dean kept up his rhythmic thrusting; and lifted his head to look at me.  
He looked at me questioningly; as if asking, is this right? Are you almost there?. I nodded; and dug my fingers into his skin – letting out a loud whimper, as my walls clenched once again around him.  
Speeding up his thrusts, and pushing harder into me, Dean had me coming around him within seconds, and he followed me close behind – then relaxed in top of me; kissing my cheeks and my forehead, before letting his lips meet mine in a deep kiss.

Gently pulling out of me, Dean laid on his back, and pulled me into his arms; so I rested against his chest. He kissed the top of my head.  
“I love you, Lou… Please don’t ever forget that”.  
I looked up at him.  
“Why are you acting like we’re saying goodbye?”, I croaked.  
He sighed, and shook his head.  
“I don’t… It’s not. I’m sorry”. He held me tightly, and I moved to lay on top of him.  
“When can I see you again?”, I croaked.  
“I don’t know… I’ll try to come back whenever I can…”.  
“But you need to do your job. And take care of Sam”, I muttered. “I know”.

Dean cupped my chin, and pressed his lips to mine again. I suckled at his lower lip, and slid my tongue over it. I felt his penis twitch slightly between my thighs.  
“I thought you were…”, I breathed.  
“Apparently not”, Dean smirked. He kissed me again, and breathed in. I took his hand, and moved it to my bottom; relishing in how he squeezed at it.  
I sat up – straddling him – and scooted down, to grab his member in my hands, and stroked it back to full hardness; before raising myself, and sliding down over him again – closing my eyes in pleasure.  
Dean placed his hands on my hips, and guided my movements. As I moved up and down, he had me circling my hips – his lips parted, and that adorable W between his brows appeared. I ran my index finger from his hairline, and down over it, his nose, and his lips.  
I circled his nipples with my fingertips, and gasped, when Dean thrusted into me hard in response. I bit my lip, and clenched my muscles around him. His eyes widened.  
“Did you… again?”. I shook my head and smirked; doing it again – making him almost hiss. “Oh, wow”, he grunted.

He put his hands on my shoulders, and pulled me to lay down on him.  
“Do it again”, he whispered. I chuckled, and tightened my muscles again – making Dean thrust hard in response. He dug his fingers into my skin, and I ran mine through his hair – kissing him passionately as he continued his movements.  
I felt the coil inside me tighten, and soon I was clenching without having to work for it.  
“Lou, you’re gonna make me…”, Dean croaked, before he pushed into me one final time, and letting go, as we came together. He panted into my shoulder.  
“I love you”, I breathed, and kissed his temple; before climbing off him, and laying down on the bed.  
“I love you too”, he muttered. “But I have to go”.  
“I know”, I sighed.

Dean got off the bed, and began getting dressed. He picked up my panties from the floor, and held them up.  
“Can I keep these?” he smirked.  
“No, you weirdo!”, I laughed, and got on my knees, snatching the lacy things from him. He put on his boxers and jeans; and pulled his t-shirt over his head.  
Before he could get to his flannel shirt, I sprang from the bed, and grabbed it.  
“You took mine”, I said.  
“Trade you for the panties”, Dean smirked at me.  
“Not happening”, I smiled, and got on my toes to kiss him.

He put his arms around me; and held me close for a moment, playing with my fingers on the hand in which I held my underwear. The air in the cabin was chilly, and I was getting goosebumps. Dean grabbed the shirt from my hands, and helped me put it on.  
“There’s firewood in the shed, and an old truck out back. Keys under the seat”, he muttered.  
“I’ll be fine”, I whispered. “Go…”.  
He put his forehead to mine, before kissing me one last time, and tearing himself free; walking out the room, with me behind him.  
At the front door, he paused.  
“Lock this…”, he said poignantly; then smiled sadly, and closed the door behind him.  
I locked it, and went to look at him go, by the window.

As Dean entered the Impala, he looked up at me – and with a smirk – he held up my panties, and put them in his pocket; before starting the car, and driving away.

\---

Rufus’ cabin was nothing if not safe. It seemed he’d lined all panels with iron, and there were multiple sacks of salt in the shed next to large amounts of firewood, that kept me warm during the night. Summer hadn’t quite taken on just yet, so it was quite cold if I didn’t keep a fire going.  
I went through drawers and cabinets, finding old pictures of the hunter himself – who I’d never met in person, but only heard about – along with other friends; or rather hunters, I suspected. There were even a few pictures of Bobby strewn about, and I felt my heart skip a beat, from seeing his smiling face look back at me from a polaroid.

There was no food in the cabin, so with a credit card made out to Vivian Campbell – Dean had probably thought the name of the Def Leppard member would make it easier for me to get away with using the card – I drove the old truck into Whitefish proper, and got some basic supplies; including some herbs – just in case I came across a case where I’d need them.

After a few days of going through Rufus’ old papers and books, I was getting restless. I’d get texts from Dean once in a while, mostly to check I was ok, and not chasing down any wendigos or anything else that was out of your league, Lou, as he’d say.  
Without a computer it was difficult to do any real research, and all I had was an old tv, to keep up to date on what was going on in the world. I noticed a news report on a grizzly finding of two murdered priests. The camera panned over the police cars, and one car I immediately recognized. A black muscle car.  
“What are you doing, guys…?”, I muttered to myself.

Tamara called me and invited me along on a werewolf hunt, but I declined; knowing she had all the backup she needed.  
“Are you ok, love? You sound tired”, she asked.  
“I’m fine. Really. I’m just on the trail of something else right now”, I responded.  
“You still in Kansas?”, Tamara muttered.  
“No… Montana. For now”, I said  
“How are the lads?”.  
“Good, I think”, I sighed. “We’re taking some time apart”.  
“Good for you! Don’t let that silly boy run your life”.  
“He’s not”, I croaked. “We worked it out, don’t worry. On the same page. More or less”.  
“All right. I have to go. Call me if you need me, yeah?”.  
I promised her I would, and hung up.  
Dean wasn’t running my life, but he was keeping me safe, I reminded myself. A bit too safe, I added to myself.

After about a month of the hermit life, I was going stir crazy.  
Former trips to the library in Whitefish had led to a single salt and burn about 5 hours away, but that was all I’d been able to track down.  
I packed up the truck with my equipment; set on finding something – anything – to do with my time. I went to the library, and spent some time on a computer, looking for something easy to throw myself at.  
Suddenly someone touched my shoulder. I turned around startled, and looked into the eyes of a bespectacled man in a dress shirt and knitted vest.  
“Miss? Are you looking for something specific?”, he asked softly. Behind his glasses, I saw his eyes widen, and recognized him, as I had the maid.

I threw myself backwards, and drew my blade.  
“Stay away from me!”, I growled.  
The librarian-angel held up his hands.  
“I’m not here to hurt you, Lulu. I’m here to protect you”.  
“From what?”, I snarled. “You jerks have done enough!”.  
“The witness must be kept safe”, the angel said. “You carry something holy within you”.  
“What?”, I demanded; holding my blade in front of me.  
“Something that will lead us to the traitor”.  
“What traitor? You’re not making any sense!”, I croaked.

The angel stepped forward, cautiously holding his hands up.  
“We were thrown from our home, to walk this planet with… humans”, he almost sneered. “We deserve recompense. You are our link to that. To him”.  
I felt my heart beginning to beat fiercely, almost as if leading me forward. Without any real control over it, I stepped forward, and my hand lifted. The angel looked at me confusedly; when suddenly, I ran my blade through his chest, and light streamed from the wound and his eyes.  
He collapsed on the floor in front of me.

“Oh, god…”, I rasped. I looked around myself, realizing that – lucky for me – our encounter had been hidden by large shelves, and no one was around. I’d just killed an angel.  
I grabbed my bag, and ran out of the library; throwing myself into the truck. My heart stilled to a normal beating, but I still felt it leading my movements. Grabbing a large map from the glove compartment; and looked it over.  
Idaho. I need to go to Idaho, I realized. I didn’t know why, but I knew it was my next step. Starting up the car, I put it in drive, and sped out of the lot, and out of Whitefish.

I called up Dean. After three rings, he picked up.  
“Sorry, Lou. It’s a bad time”.  
“You’re telling me. I just killed a librarian-angel!”, I croaked.  
“You… what? What happened?”, Dean demanded.  
“He was just standing there. Talking about keeping me safe, and using me to find someone”.  
Dean let out a low growl.  
“You’re driving. Where are you going?”, he said.  
“Idaho”, I said.  
“Why?”.  
“I just have to”, I muttered. “I think it’s… that thing Metatron did to me. I have to find someone”.  
Dean paused.  
“Who’s in Idaho?”, he said.  
“I don’t know”.  
“Then go back!”, Dean snarled.  
“No. I can’t, even if I wanted to. Did you miss the part, where I killed a librarian?”, I yelled. “I wanna come home…”.  
“You can’t”, Dean sighed. “Not yet… I’ll come meet you”.  
I clenched my jaw, and winced when the mufflers of the truck didn’t react very well as I went over a speed bump.  
“No… Stay with Sam. Just get this over with”.  
“You’re angry, I get it”, Dean tried.  
“Damn right, I’m angry!”, I said. “I’ve spent weeks in a cold ass cabin waiting for word from you. I can’t even talk to Sam, because you’re telling me it’s unsafe. He’s my friend, Dean!”.  
“I know, Lou…”.  
“Do you? I want to help! I want to make sure someone I love heals from what you’re telling me is something really bad, but you won’t let me near…”.  
“He can’t heal if you see him… Baby… Please. Just let me come meet you”.  
“No”, I proclaimed. “I’m doing this on my own. I have to. Just get back to… whatever it is you do these days”. I hung op on him, and roared out my frustrations, before throwing the phone on the seat next to me.

I drove for 6 hours straight, with nothing but a voice inside telling me where to go.  
In Idaho Falls the truck needed gas, and I pulled up to a Gas-N-Sip. When I stepped out of the car, my body suddenly felt warm and my heart began beating hard again. With shaking hands, I filled up the tank, and stepped inside to pay.  
A friendly looking blonde stood behind the counter.  
“Hi there. Which pump?”.  
“Uhm… 3”, I muttered. I handed her my card, and leaned against the counter, my knuckles white from my hold on it.  
“You just passing through?”, the attendant asked. Her nametag read Nora.  
“Kind of… I’m looking for someone”, I said.  
“Who?”, she asked, as she ran the card. This process was always grueling for me; as I hated using fake credit cards. I always felt like they’d bounce, and police would show up.  
“I’m not sure…”, I croaked. The card went through, and Nora handed it back to me.

“Lulu?”, a voice behind me breathed. I turned around; and was staring into the face of Castiel.  
“Cass?”, I whispered.  
“You know each other, Steve?”, Nora asked.  
Castiel parted his lips, searching for the right words.  
“Lulu is my… sister”, he croaked. He stepped forward. “Do you mind if I take my break now? It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other”.  
“Of course!”, Nora exclaimed. “Use the office”.  
Castiel kept his eyes on mine, as he stepped over, and put his hand on my back. He let out a short breath, before leading me towards a door next to the restrooms.

Once inside the office, he closed the door. My lips began quivering, and I threw my arms around the neck of my friend.  
“Cass”, I began sobbing. “Where have you been? Are you ok?”.  
Castiel embraced me.  
“I am all right. Are you?”, he asked.  
I stepped back; wiping my face, and nodding.  
“I’m… hiding. Again”.

My heart was beating hard, but not painfully. Cass looked me over.  
“You should not be here. Why did you come?”.  
“I don’t know. I just had to”, I croaked. “There was an angel… He’s gone now”.  
“You… killed him?”, Cass asked, raising a brow at me. I nodded.  
“I didn’t mean to”, I breathed. “He was talking about finding someone. That they needed me for that… Then I just stabbed him”.

Cass sighed deeply.  
“What’s going on?”, I asked, searching his eyes – and suddenly realizing something. “You’re not an angel”, I gasped. He shook his head.  
“Not anymore. Metatron took my grace”, he said.  
“To… make the angels fall…”, I said. “He tricked you”.  
“Yes, he did. But that’s not all”, my friend said, looking at me with timid eyes. “Not all my grace was used for the fall. Some of it is stored”.  
“Where?”, I whispered; dreading the answer.  
Cass lifted his hand, and put it above my heart.  
“Here…”, he said. “I had to chose someone to carry a part of me… to be the witness”.  
“You chose… not Metatron?”, I asked. Castiel nodded.  
“It was the safest place I knew. I needed someone good and pure – and I could only think of you”.

I went to sit down.  
“You’re… inside me?”, I rasped.  
“My grace… or at least part of it, is”, Cass explained. “It’s part of the prophecy. There needs to be a human witness; someone who can see the angels as they walk with the humans. That is what my grace is doing in you. It’s showing you – to some extent – what I could see as an angel… This was forced on me, I’m sorry, Lulu”.  
“Why? What am I supposed to do with it?”, I asked.  
“Honestly, I don’t know. Metatron didn’t tell me. It was just part of the ritual”.

Castiel took my hand; and the connection made the hair on my arm raise.  
“It wants to come back to you”, I rasped. “It knows it doesn’t belong with me”.  
“I know. When that angel spoke of using you against me, it made you kill him. That is why you shouldn’t be here”, Castiel said. “It should be working for you, not against you”.  
I ran a hand over my face.  
“So, what am I supposed to do now?”, I asked.  
Cass shrugged.  
“The prophecy… I don’t know much about it. Metatron lied to me about so many things”, he said. “But as far as I can gather, you’re supposed to witness what comes next”.  
“And what’s that?”.  
“War… between the angels”.

I stood back up, and began shaking my hands – stretching – to get the uncomfortable feeling of something trying to escape my body, and jump at Castiel.  
“Great. I’ll just drive around the country and look on as angels kill each other. Is that it?”.  
“There has to be more”, Castiel said. “I just don’t know what…”.

There was knock on the door, and Nora peeked inside.  
“Sorry, Steve. But I’m getting swamped out here…”.  
“Yes, I will be right there!”, Castiel smiled. “Lulu… you should go home. We’ll… talk more. Another time”.  
He led me through the shop, and out to the truck.  
I turned to look at him, finding it difficult to find the right words.  
“Cass…”, I croaked.  
“Drive far away from here. Don’t come back”. He put a hand on my cheek. “I know this is a heavy burden, and I am very sorry. But I chose you, because I know you can carry it. I trust you”.

With shaking hands, I got behind the wheel. As I drove away, Castiel waved at me, and went back inside the shop.

\---

Without a clue on what my next step should be – and fighting the celestial urge within me to turn around, and see Castiel again – I drove south; without direction or any plans.  
Reaching Utah, I finally decided to throw caution to the wind, and head east instead.  
I called up Deans number.  
“Dean’s phone…”.  
“Sam?”, I cried out.  
“Lulu! How’s solo hunting going?”, Sam said. I could hear a bright smile in his voice.  
“I’m not… It’s good. How are you? Are you healing?”.  
“I’m fine! I’ve been fine for weeks. Dean’s just being weird. When are you coming home?”, Sam asked.  
I took a deep breath, feeling rage emerge.  
“I’m on my way back”, I grunted.  
“You sound strange. You sure you’re fine?”.  
“What did Dean tell you?”, I said.  
“Just that you were working. Is something wrong?”, my friend asked.  
“I don’t know yet. Could you not tell him I’m coming? I want it to be a surprise”.  
Sam chuckled.  
“Sure. We both know how Dean loves surprises”, he joked. “I’ll keep my mouth shut”.  
“Thanks. See you tomorrow”, I grunted, and hung up.

I couldn’t let Dean know I was coming back. I wasn’t sure what he’d do, he might even rush to find a case, and haul ass out of the bunker with his brother, so I wouldn’t be able to see Sam. And I needed to see him; to know why he was keeping me away.  
This was my call, even if it was a bad one. It was a chance I had to take.

I drove through the night, only stopping for gas, and grabbing a quick bite at a drive through. The girl in the window who handed me my burger, looked at me intently – and I recognized her as angel. I sped away as fast as I could.  
Putting some extra miles on the meter to avoiding any tails; but finally found myself back on course for Lebanon.  
16 hours after I’d left Idaho Falls, I parked the truck in front of the bunker door. I saw Charlies car further down the road, and wondered what she was doing back with the guys.

I quietly opened the bunker door, and stepped inside. I could hear music playing from the library, and walked down the stairs. The old record player was playing Somewhere Over The Rainbow, and I recognized Charlies stickered computer on the map table.  
Dean was standing with his back to the room in the archway, as I made it all the way down the steps.  
“I don’t know, man. I’m worried. She’s on friggin’ Oz!”, he grumbled.  
Sam was seated by one of the tables, and sent his brother a smiled.  
“She’s got Dorothy looking after her. She’ll be fine”, he said; before seeing me behind Dean. “Hey!”, he grinned.

Dean turned around, and his face dropped.  
“Lou…”, he croaked. “Why… what are you doing here?”.  
“I came home…”, I said meaningfully. “How is everything here?”.  
Dean gulped, and looked over his shoulder at Sam.  
“Good. We’re good”, he rasped. He ran over to embrace me; and once I was in his arms, he turned us around, so I had my back to Sam. “Let’s go… talk”.  
I pushed him off me.  
“No… I want to say hi to Sam”. Dean’s eyes widened, and he visibly tensed up.  
“Please don’t, Lou”, he whispered.  
I looked at him with hard eyes.  
“I’m going to say hi to my friend. You’ll have to shoot me to stop me”, I muttered. I pushed hard at his chest, and Dean’s defeated and pained expression almost had me wanting to stroke his stubbly cheek – but I needed to know the truth. A truth I had begun to suspect since my meeting with Castiel.

I turned around and smiled brightly at Sam, before stepping over to him. He held out his arms, and embraced me tightly.  
“Hi, Lulu!”, he smiled. “It’s so good to see you… whole!”. I pulled my head back, and looked into his eyes. A chill went through me body, when I saw what was living inside him.  
“Sam…”, I croaked. “What’s…?”.  
Dean sprang over, and grabbed my arm.  
“That’s enough. I haven’t seen my girl for over a month”, he grinned; his smile not reaching his eyes. “We’re going to do dirty things in my room. Don’t come in!”.

He dragged me behind him down the hallway, and pushed me into his room – closing the door behind us.  
“Why are you here? I told you…”.  
“What did you do, Dean?”, I snarled.  
Dean took a defensive stance.  
“I made a call. I couldn’t let Sam die”, he declared.  
“Does he know you let an angel in?”, I hissed. “He’d never…”.  
“I know! And he can’t know”, Dean said. “He’ll kick him out. And he’s not ready for that. His body can’t take it yet”. He sighed deeply. “I came to see you in Michigan, because I needed to know the truth. If you’d be able to see the angel in Sam… If you told him…”, Dean croaked. “I didn’t want to push you away. I just wanted to keep my brother safe”.

I paced the floor.  
“Are you crazy? What do you think will happen when we tell him?”.  
Dean grabbed my shoulders.  
“You’re not going to tell him!”, he growled. “So help me God, I will…”. He didn’t finish the sentence.  
“Kill me?”, I hissed. “Is that what you’ll do? Anything for your brother, right?”.  
Dean let go of me.  
“You know I’d never… how can you even think that?”.  
“You seem to be making a lot of decisions about the lives of others”, I snarled.  
He put his hands on either side of my face, and looked deep into my eyes.  
“That is never happening. But I can’t…”.

There was a knock on the door.  
“Dean!”, Sam’s voice called out.  
“I’m looking at boobs. Go away!”, Dean yelled. I pushed him off me.  
“Come in, Sam”, I said. Dean looked at me, and shook his head pleadingly.  
Sam’s tall frame stepped through the door, and his eyes met mine again – the angel inside coming through more clearly.  
“She has to leave”, he said; his tone different from how I knew it.  
“Sam…”, I began.  
“I am not Sam now”, the angel said.  
Dean’s eyes fell to the floor.  
“This is Zeke. Ezekiel. He’s healing Sam from the inside”, he muttered. “Zeke, this is Lulu”.

The angel stepped up to me, and looked down into my eyes. I swallowed hard.  
“I know who she is. Sam thinks of her fondly; as a good friend”. He narrowed his eyes at me. “If you are a good friend, Lulu; you will leave now. Let me finish my work”.  
I shook my head.  
“You can’t do this to Sam without him knowing! It’s not right…”.  
“If you do not leave, I will have to hurt you”, the angel declared; and suddenly a force threw me at the wall, as if choking me.  
Dean jumped in between us.  
“Zeke! Let her go. She’s not a danger to you, or to Sam”.  
“She has to leave. Now. She will not stay quiet”.  
Dean looked at the angel pleadingly.  
“Please… I’ll make her go. Just don’t hurt her”. He held up his hands in surrender.

I felt the force holding me disappear, and I fell to the floor, coughing. Dean sprang to my side, and pulled me into his arms. He put his hand on my cheek and searched my eyes.  
“Are you ok?”, he breathed. I nodded tentatively.  
“Make her leave. Or I will”, the angel said; and left the room.

“You have to go”, Dean whispered, putting his forehead to mine. “Please… for both of you”.  
I grabbed his collar, and looked at him angrily.  
“You tell him, Dean. End this!”, I croaked; my throat still sore.  
“I will… I swear. It just needs to happen at the right time”.  
He leant in as if to kiss me, but I turned my head.  
“You lied to me. You’re lying to my friend”, I said. “Fix it; then maybe… Maybe we can fix us”.  
I got on my feet and left the room.

Once back in the library, Sam was standing over the table, looking at his computer. When he heard me enter, with Dean close behind, he turned around.  
“That was fast”, he chuckled.  
“I’m leaving”, I muttered. “I have to go away from here”.  
“Lulu”, Dean tried.  
“Goodbye”, I said. I went towards the stairs – my legs shaky – and looked over my shoulder at Sam. “You”, I said, speaking to the angel inside him. “You take care of him, or I won’t answer for the consequences”.  
Sam looked at me confusedly.  
“We always take care of each other Lulu. You know that”, he said. “What’s going on with you?”.  
“It’s been a difficult month”, I muttered.

Sam picked up Charlie’s computer, and went over to hand it to me.  
“Charlie’s… she’s not gonna need this for a while. Maybe you can use it”.  
“Thanks”, I whispered; and took the device from him, before running up the stairs as fast as I could.  
I got into the truck, and sped away.

\---

I found it difficult to drive; as my tears made the road blurry in front of my eyes. After a while I had to pull over, and let loose.  
I cried in deep sobs. I knew Dean would do anything for Sam, for me even; but this – what he had done to his brother, my friend – it was beyond anything I’d ever thought him capable of.

I finally settled down, and made my way to a motel just outside Kansas City. I needed sleep, and to calm my nerves. I checked in as Taylor Hanson, and let myself into the room; almost collapsing on the bed.  
When I woke, I looked at my phone. I’d been sleeping for 12 hours straight; and had several missed calls and a few voicemails.  
I sighed deeply, and checked them.  
“Lou. It’s me… I’m sorry. Please don’t… Don’t disappear on me again. I know what I did was rash, and probably stupid; but I had to… I love you. Call me back”.  
The next message was from 3 hours later.  
“Ok. You’re pissed. I get it. But I don’t regret it. Once this is over, everything will be ok. You can come back… I really want you to”.  
5 hours after that, Dean had left another message. He sounded drunk.  
“You know what? Do what you want. Hunt, get your ass kicked without me to save you. I’m done. I’m gonna focus on getting my brother back in shape”. I heard some glass falling and crashing. “Woops, that’s my beer. Anyway… Take care, sugar. Maybe we’ll bump into each other someday. I’m gonna go now… You, uhm… keep that cute ass out of trouble. Right… Bye”.  
Five minutes after that, Dean had left a final message.  
“Lou… baby. I love you. I love…”. He must have hung up accidentally, because the call ended abruptly.

I laid back on the bed, and ran a hand over my face. I was so angry, and yet in anguish over how I’d ended it when I left. Everything had gone to hell, ever since I went to – well, Hell.

There was a final voicemail, and I pressed the button to listen.  
“Hey, Jordan… It’s Chloe… from the bar. It’s been a while. I understand if you don’t remember…”. She sounded choked. “I’m… I need your help. There’s a guy here…”. There was a rustling, and another voice came through. “I’ll do it. Hey, honey. It’s me. I just wanted to say I’m sorry if I scared you back in that alley. I can hardly remember coming back to the bar”. Pete was using his loving voice. “I have your friend here. Chloe. I really need to see you, Lulukins. Please come… or I’ll have to hurt Chloe. The address is…”.  
I sprang from the bed, and got dressed as Pete gave the instructions on where to meet him.  
“You have … 4 hours, before Chloe will be late for work. See you, my love”.

Four hours. As I’d been asleep for so long, at this point it was more like two.  
Loading my gun with normal bullets, and settling my iron knife in the pocket of my leather jacket; I got in the truck, and sped towards the meeting place.

I parked the truck down the street from the bar Pete had worked at after we moved to KC. It had gone out of business after a year there; leaving Pete in our shared apartment, playing acoustic guitar, and working on his music. He really was a douchebag.  
I snuck into the building, my gun at the ready. Someone was playing guitar.  
“Pete…? Chloe?”, I called out; keeping my back to the wall. The music stopped, and I heard a muffled scream. “Let her go!”, I yelled.

“You can come out, Lulu. It’s ok”, Pete bellowed.  
I slowly stepped out from the entryway, and into the bar area. On a small stage stood Pete – a guitar in hand – and Chloe tied up on a chair next to him, a muzzle over her mouth.  
I raised my gun, and aimed it at my ex.  
“Let her go, Pete. She doesn’t need to be involved in this”, I said softly, and walked forwards. “Please. This isn’t you”.  
Pete set down the guitar, and clenched his fists in front of his chest.  
“But it is, honey!”, he sighed. “This is who you’ve made me become… I love you so much”.  
“Tying up an innocent girl isn’t love”, I said. “Let her go, and I’ll put down the gun. Then we can talk”.  
Pete held out his hands in surrender.  
“Ok, ok… Just… come up here… Help me. I think I tied her up too hard”.

I frowned, and got onto the stage; standing behind Chloe. She was tied with ropes, in intricate knots.  
“Get off the stage”, I said to Pete; waving at him with my gun. He obliged, and went down to sit on a table left behind by the former owners.  
I secured my gun, and put it in the back of my jeans; pulling out my knife to cut Chloe free.  
“I’m so sorry. This shouldn’t have happened”, I muttered; and got the ropes off her wrists. She removed the muzzle herself, and got up to stand. I got in front of her, to shield her from Pete.  
“You’re right. It shouldn’t have”, Chloe hissed, and grabbed my gun from my waistband; aiming it at my back. “Sit down”.

“Good job, sissy!”, Pete smiled. “I knew you could do it”.  
“Thank you!”, Chloe chuckled.  
I looked at Pete with confused and startled eyes.  
“Right!”, Pete said. “You never met my sister… Well, now is a good a time as any. Honey, meet Chloe. Sissy, this is my Lulu”.  
Chloe put her hand on my shoulder, and pushed me to sit down on the chair.  
“Drop the knife”, she said. I let go of the blade in my hand; letting it drop to the floor.

“What’s going on?”, I croaked.  
Chloe stepped in front of me; still aiming the gun at me.  
“What’s happening? Oh, you bitch!”, she snarled.  
“Chloe, it’s ok. Lulu is just confused”, Pete said.  
His sister scoffed.  
“Was she confused when she dumped you? Broke your heart to run off with someone else?”, she growled. “I should kill her!”.  
Pete jumped back on the stage, and grabbed the gun from Chloe.  
“Relax… ok? I don’t want to hurt her. Just talk… For now”.

Pete crouched in front of me; and ran his hand up and down my arm, as if soothing me.  
“Pete, I’ll talk. But not while you’re holding a gun”, I said.  
“Here’s the thing…”, Pete sighed; pointing the gun at me. “You had a lot of weird things hidden around the apartment when we lived together. For one, that freaky silver-sword. I don’t know whether you won’t try to escape, or even hurt me…”.  
I let my lip quiver, and looked down. Pete leaned in, as I knew he would; and once he did, I headbutted him, and ran for the door.

Chloe threw herself at me; and I struggled to get her off me.  
“You can’t win this fight, Lulu!”, Pete yelled. He was holding a hand to his bleeding nose. “Read some of those books you kept around. I know what you do”.  
Chloe smirked at me.  
“We made ourselves a little witch-juice; from a spell in one of them”, she said. “We’re much stronger than your run of the mill bartender and artist”.  
“Aww, sissy!”, Pete tweeted. “You think I’m an artist?”.  
“Of course you are! You’re an amazing musician…”. I scoffed; and Chloe punched me in the face. “He is amazing!”.

Pete crouched down next to me.  
“I know this is hard to understand, honey… But I’d do anything for love”.  
“Quoting Meatloaf won’t get me in any more of a romantic mood”, I sputtered; still struggling against the woman straddling me.  
Seemingly struggling to keep his composure, Pete grabbed my phone from my pocket.  
“We’re going to end this. You’re going to call him, get him here; and once he’s dead, you and I can start anew”.  
“No…”, I croaked.  
“Yes”, Chloe hissed; almost spitting in my face.  
“Bitch, you ever heard of mouthwash?”, I snarled.  
She growled, and raised her fist.  
“Chloe!”, Pete roared. “Stand down…”.

Chloe got off me, and Pete pulled me to my feet. With a firm grip to my throat, he walked me onto the stage again, and sat me on the chair. He handed the gun to Chloe, who aimed it at me.  
“Call him. I can’t promise I’ll be able to stop her from shooting you if you don’t”, Pete said warningly. “Tell him you’re alone, and to come alone himself”.  
“I’m gonna have to convince him… We were in a fight”, I rasped.  
Pete nodded.  
“Whatever you have to do”.  
Swallowing hard, I took the phone, and dialed up Dean.

“Lou”, he said quietly. “Look, I’m…”.  
“Hey, baby”, I croaked, interrupting Dean. “You still in Lebanon?”  
“Yeah?”, he growled. “Why?”.  
“No reason. I hear it’s a real funky town there. Is that Fleetwood Mac you’re playing?”, I said.  
I could almost hear Dean tensing up.  
“Yeah. Partying hard. You wanna meet up?”, he muttered.  
“That sounds good… Come alone, ok?”.  
“Address?”.  
I gave Dean the address of the bar, and let out a deep sigh.  
“I’m sorry for calling like this. I know you’re busy”. I looked up at Pete, who gestured for me to wrap it up. “So, I’ll see you soon”.  
“Yeah. Bye”. Dean hung up.

Pete put my phone in his pocket, and leant down to kiss my forehead.  
“You did good, honey”, he whispered. “This’ll all be over soon”.  
“It’s gonna take him a while to get here”, I muttered.  
“That’s ok. I’ll play you some music”. I groaned internally, but had no wish to be shot by the psycho baby sister of my ex; so, I simply nodded.

\---

After being tied up – and sitting through a few hours of Pete playing a solo set of every Nickelback song he knew – I heard the sound of the Impala outside.  
“He’s here…”, I said. Behind my back, I had been continuously working on loosening the knots of the ropes holding me.  
Pete put down the guitar, and walked over to me; holding my knife to my throat. Chloe ducked out of view.  
Dean stepped into the bar, looking seriously hung over.  
“Hey”, he grunted. “Nice place you have here”. He looked at me. “You good?”, he asked. I nodded twice, letting him know Pete wasn’t alone.

“This is him?”, Pete muttered. “You left me for this guy?”.  
I rolled my eyes.  
“No I left you because you were clingy and a douchebag”. A smirk ghosted Deans face. “And your jeans are too tight!”, I yelled, finally free from the ropes. I elbowed Pete in the groin, and jumped up. I kicked the bent over Pete in the head; and ducked out of the way, just as Chloe shot the gun at us, hitting her own brother in the process.  
“You sure you need me here?”, Dean exclaimed.  
“I needed a distraction”, I snarled. “Could you maybe help me out with the little one?”.

Dean pulled out his knife, as I grabbed my own from the heavily panting Pete; holding it to his neck.  
“A knife won’t kill me!”, he growled.  
“Iron, Petey”, I smiled. “Let me say this one final time. We are over”.  
I began pressing the knife downwards; when Chloe jumped at me – knocking me to the floor.  
“Get off him!”, she shrieked.  
Dean ran towards us, and kicked Chloe hard in the ribs, making her wince, but not budge from me. She held the gun to my head.  
“Why are you doing this, Chloe?”, I asked.  
“He’s my brother. I would do anything for him”.

“Trust me, kid. Doing anything for family doesn’t always work out well”, Dean snarled. Behind us, he’d grabbed Pete, and was now holding his own knife to his heart. “Get up”.  
Chloe’s eyes widened, and she got off me; dropping the gun to the floor.  
“Please don’t hurt him”, she croaked. “I just wanted him… happy”.  
Dean looked at me.  
“It’s your call, Lou”, he grunted.  
“Can we strip them of magic?”, I asked.  
Chloe shook her head.  
“If you do, Pete will die from that gunshot”, she whimpered.  
“You should have thought of that before”, I snarled.

Dean put down his knife, and looked Pete with enraged eyes.  
“You get out of here. Go far away”, he growled; his eyes aflame. “If you even set foot near this woman again; I will find you – and I will rip your lungs out with my bare hands. Is that understood?”. The scene brought me back to a diner, years before; when his father had used those same words.  
Pete looked towards me.  
“Is this what you want, honey?”.

I stepped towards him – grabbing my gun as I passed it – looked down; and kicked him in the head; knocking him out. I looked at Chloe.  
“There’s a truck outside. Go to Alaska; and stay there!”, I hissed. “I will know if you leave; and I’ll know if you cause trouble”.  
“How?”, she croaked.  
“You’re not the only one with a little knowledge of magic”, I smirked sarcastically. “Now, go!”.

Chloe sprang for Pete, and picked him up, as if he weighed no more than a toddler.  
“Oh, cupcake?”, Dean called after her. “We have friends in Alaska. They’ll find you if needs be”.  
Chloe swallowed, and nodded – then carried Pete outside.

I went to sit down on the edge of the stage. Dean sat down next to me.  
“You ok?”.  
“He played me Nickelback…”, I croaked. “For hours!”.  
Dean pulled me into his arms.  
“Oh my god. I’m so sorry”. He kissed the top of my head, and rubbed my shoulder.  
I sighed.  
“I’m sorry you got dragged into this”, I muttered.  
“It’s fine. You didn’t seem to need much help anyway…”, he smiled. “Good call on the Mac reference. I’m still pretty sure Stevie is a witch as well”.  
“If she is, it’s a white witch. And those we like… right?”.  
Dean chuckled.

“Can you take me back to my motel? I lost my ride”, I breathed.  
“I’ll do you one better. I’ll take you home”, Dean said; and stood up, pulling me with him.  
“No…”, I said.  
“No?”, he asked. “Lou…”.  
“I can’t go back there. Not while Sam is still… No. You heard the angel”.  
“Baby, I’m going to let Sam know”, Dean said. “This needs to end”.  
I nodded.  
“Yeah, it does”. I looked at him with gentle eyes.  
Deans jaw dropped.  
“You mean… No!”, he gasped. “That’s not an option. I’m not letting you go, Lou. I can’t!”.

I put my arms around him.  
“I spent a month in that cabin, Dean. Waiting for you to give me the all’s clear”, I sighed. “All I wanted to do was get out there and work, but I didn’t, because I needed to stay out of what was happening with Sam; and I couldn’t make myself known to anyone. I’m done with that”.  
“With me, you mean”, Dean breathed.  
“No… We’re endgame…”, I smiled, and looked up at him. “But I have to go out there and do my own thing. I think that’s why I took that job. To figure out who I am, apart from being your… in house sex-bunny”. His lips twitched into a slight smile.

“But what about this witness thing?”, Dean said. “You could get hurt…”.  
I shrugged.  
“It’s what we do, right? Hunters get hurt. Hunters get hurt, then we patch ourselves up, and move on”.  
Dean clenched his jaw.  
“And you… are a hunter”, he muttered.  
“Someone even told me I was kind of ok at it”, I smirked. “Look… Go finish this thing with Sam. And I mean finish it. You’re not letting my friend run around with an angel inside him. It’s enough that one of us has to deal with that”.  
Dean frowned.  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”, he asked.  
I shook my head.  
“Don’t worry about it. Just take me back to my motel”.

Dean sighed deeply, took my hand, and led me outside. The truck was gone, and I got in next to him in the Impala. We drove back to my motel; and Dean walked me to the door.  
“You all set up?”, he grunted, as I opened the door. “Credit cards? Weapons?”.  
“I’m good”, I said. “Just need a partner… Thinking of calling up Charlie. She’s fun”.  
Dean winced.  
“Yeah… she’s fighting flying monkeys”.  
“What?”, I grunted.  
“Oz… It’s a thing”, Dean muttered. He scratched his head. “Sam thinks I’m out scouting for a case… I have a few hours”.  
I smirked.  
“You asking to test the springs of the mattress in there?”.  
“Hell, yeah”, he grinned.

I grabbed his collar, pulled him inside; and just managed to slip the do not disturb sign on the knob, before closing the door.

\---

I’m getting out of the car in Illinois, to grab a quick bite at a diner. Charlie’s 1976 Gremlin was parked outside my motel the day after Dean dropped me of there; with a note letting me know it shouldn’t go to waste while she was away.  
I’ve packed it up with my belongings, and painted a devil’s trap on the ceiling.  
It’s been a good while since I’ve seen any of the brothers. Dean checks in when he can, but the messages are few and far between. Lately, even further. He seems preoccupied, and even bitter when we talk.  
I sit down in a booth, and order a large coffee and some bacon. Pulling out my – Charlie’s computer – I go over my notes on the case. A pimply teenage boy brings me my order; as I’m enthralled by the witness statements on local cow mutilations. They seem to have been torn apart by some kind of animal.  
Suddenly, a tall figure sits down across from me. I look up, and my eyes widen.  
“Sam?”, I breathe.  
“Hey, Lulu”, my friend smiles. I swallow hard. “I’m me again. No stowaways”, Sam assures me.  
“Oh… good. And you’re… ok?”, I croak.  
He nods.  
“Working a case”.  
“Alone?”, I ask.  
Sam clenches his jaw, and looks down.  
“Yeah… Dean’s on some… I don’t know”.  
I sigh.  
“I’m sorry… I wanted to tell you”.  
He grabs my hand over the table.  
“I know… We’re good. Really”.  
I try a smile.  
“But Dean?”, I ask.  
“He… That wasn’t his call to make”, Sam says. “I was ready to go”.  
I squeeze his hand.  
“Sam… He is who he is. He didn’t want to lose you”.  
Sam shrugs.  
“He was selfish”.  
“Maybe”, I say quietly. “But he’s your brother, and he loves you”.  
My friend clears his throat.  
“I don’t want to talk about it”, he mutters. “Tell me about you! What are you working on?”.  
I turn around my computer for him to see. He frowns.  
“This, uhm… this is my case”, he chuckles. “You’re working on this?”.  
“Yup…”, I smile.  
“I’m thinking werewolf”, Sam whispers.  
I narrow my eyes.  
“I’m not so sure… See these clawmarks?”, I show him a picture. “The cow was torn apart. Not bitten in to. Rugaru?”.  
Sam smiles at me.  
“Tell you what… We do this one together. If it’s a wolf, you buy the beer; if not, I do”.  
“Deal”, I grin.


End file.
